Small Wins, Big Changes: Building Confidence After Divorce

 The past few weeks have been a mix of challenges and progress. My iOS app had a few issues flagged during Apple’s review process. I fixed them, reapplied, and now I’m waiting to see if Apple approves. Fingers crossed—it’s been a long journey to get to this point.

On the personal side, I live on a 2-2-3 custody schedule, which means I have my kids every other weekend. When they’re with me, my focus is on them. But when they’re with their mom, I’ve had to face something harder: time alone. That quiet space used to feel like loneliness pressing in on me.

I’ve realized that I’m more of a social person than I ever thought. I actually crave connection, especially when my kids aren’t with me. So I started taking small but intentional steps—going to meetups that seemed interesting, catching up with my old childhood friend at bars (he lives two hours away, but worth it), and simply striking up conversations with strangers.

Just yesterday, I went to Dunkin’ Donuts and recognized a woman working there from her previous job. I asked her about it, and she not only remembered me but remembered my name. That surprised me in the best way, so I asked for her name, making a conscious effort to remember it this time. Before that, I made a friend at a bar by just being social and joking around.

These may sound like small things, but to me, they’ve been big. With every little social victory, something has shifted. I feel more motivated, more productive, more energetic. My appetite is back. I feel happier. Going to the gym has added to this momentum—“look good, feel good” is more than just a phrase, it’s been my reality lately.

I’m also caring less about what people think of me, and that’s given me more confidence. Talking to beautiful women is still a hurdle (lol), but I know I’ll get there. Small steps build upon each other, and that’s exactly how I’m approaching not just my social life, but also building StrengthInMen.

“Once a small win has been accomplished, forces are set in motion that favor another small win.”

“Small wins add up to big wins.”